X + Y + Z = LOVE

Love is the subject of books, poems, songs… is studied by scientists and philosphers alike… has caused wars, is sought after and chased… has mended and broken hearts, built and torn bridges… is age old and timeless, bains our existences, and is shouted from roof tops.  There are over more than 150, 000 songs about love available on iTunes, 240,000 books in circulation today, and 1.8 billion websites dedicated to the subject.   

Some say it doesn’t exist, others say it is the only thing to live for.  It is not quantifiable, yet manages to fade and grow.  It is understood by all yet is a feat to define or explain.  Love manages to foster a feeling of belonging all the while engaging a sense of freedom.  Love seems to be the ultimate in the expression of the balance of the Ying and Yang.  Love warms our hearts, gives our days purpose and is the greatest gift shared. 

While there are many factors like physical attraction, mental stimuli, common interests, political views or religions… there is something else there that we all try our best to explain, analyze or quantify.  My best friend calls this the "X" factor... A scientist would say something like our body’s “attracted” to the other person’s pheromones, or subconsciously our minds identify with the physical attributes of the other person, like the shape of their face, color of their skin, etc.  Others will talk about the stuff of “sole mates”… some may refer to past lives resolutions… And yet regardless of what you name it, there is something so magical about meeting someone that genuinely reciprocates this inexplicable feeling with you…

I have felt love by way of a compilation of emotions that, added all together, equal love… the touch of someone that “answers you”, physical attraction, immense respect, pride, sincere trust, and a bit of that pheromone stuff… ya know, feeling comfortable, liking someone’s smell…  It always seems met 50/50 by both involved.  I have experienced love as the live equivalent of the Grinch’s heart grow; I have literally felt my heart SWELL in my chest.   

Some say it is an idea created by society, the result of 12^th century aristocratic poets and courting rituals, and Valentines Day.  By now if you have read my blog, you know I think of everything in terms of humans as animals.  And while animals that don’t have the society pressures we do, animals engage in the business of “love activities” just the same as humans.  It might not be society’s version of “happily ever after”… they still find each other, grow together, mate, have families, enjoy and protect each other.  The only difference I can find is that humans are the only “animal” that has sex for pleasure, rather than only for procreation.  

And beyond all my “human nature” theories there is the “energy” angle.  They say you find the right person when you are ready… and ready means not desperately wanting, but having “placed an order” for love and freely, naturally expecting it to be fulfilled.  Now the trick is maintaining and caring for that "love" like the seedling of a baby plant… with a healthy "home", perfect mixture of “moisture” and “heat”… and voila, you have a well rooted, happy growing plant… ehem, relationship…  Hmmm… Enough said. 

I could go on and on and on... but I digress...

Love is GRAND, it gives you wings.  Happy Flying All!

WITH THAT I LEAVE WITH THE LYRICS OF ONE OF MY FAVORITE SONGS ABOUT LOVE… THAT I THINK SAYS IT QUITE WELL… BY SUGARLAND, APPROPRIATELY CALLED “LOVE.”

Is it the face of a child'
Is it the thrill of danger'
Is it the kindness we see in the eyes of a stranger'
Is it more than faith'
Is it more than hope'
Is it waiting for us at the end of our rope'

CHORUS:
I say, it’s Love.
I say, it’s love.

Is it the one you call home'
Is it the Holy Land'

Is it standing right here holding your hand'
Is it just like the movies'
Is it rice and white lace'
Is it the feeling I get when I wake to your face'

REPEAT CHORUS

Is it the first summer storm'
Is it the colors of fall' 

Is it having so little
And yet having it all'
Is it one in a million'
Is it a chance to belong'
Is it standing right here singing this song'

REPEAT CHORUS FOUR TIMES

Is it a veil or a cross'
Is it the poet’s gift'
Is it the face that has launched over thousands of ships'

Is it making you laugh'
Is it making you cry'
Is it where we believe that we go when we die'
Is it how you were made'
Is it your mother’s ghost'
Is it the wish that I’m wishing for your life, for your life, for your life the most'
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HOME SWEET HOME

Alright now... it's been 1 year... 2 months... 23 days... and 16 hours... since I moved to the Caribbean Island of Curacao... First off, I've found myself an opportunity to learn 3 languages, relive my 20's, hone my Latin dancing... and find MYSELF, spiritually and physically under this well built shell.  I feel compelled to start writing about this place, my home, that afforded me all these amazing gifts.  Thus far, I have continued to write about my process... however, now I've started to look around and really enjoy this place for what it is.  And given that every time I came through Immigrations I claimed to be a travel writer (until legally acquiring residency)... I ought to keep a bit of truth in that and let you all have a glimpse into my paradise, my reality... Also I now have a residency here, so, I'm clear!

It's quite amazing to feel at home some where, when you never felt it any where.  I often experience people careen over stories of their grandmothers kitchen, or the backyard bbq's, or the holidays growing up... I never had that feeling, no sob story, just isn't part of my "story" growing up.  I often searched for it, open to any and all opportunities, following the breeze as it floated me off to locations all over the US.  However, always curious of other cultures, I often had International friends, or took up learning new cultures through cooking classes or reading, as a way of curing my craving for diversity.  And now, having allowed the wind to drop me swiftly on a spot of land in the middle of the Caribbean Sea... oddly enough, I feel as though, I have found a place where, while a complete and utter foreigner, I fit in more completely than any where I have ever known, while still maintaining a bit of novel uniqueness. 

There is something to be said for a European Island... in which you get the best of a European life style, AND the laid back culture of the Caribbean.  First off, Europeans don't work too hard, they work just enough, and know how to keep a balance.  Unlike Americans, they value their time at home, with their families, lounging, not rushing off somewhere, not completely absorbed in TV, just sitting, and eating and visiting with friends and families.  They don't let work "own" their lives, they work to live, not live to work.  Now add a healthy dose of the Caribbean breeze, and Rum, and sunshine, and swaying palm trees... and you get the MOST relaxed environment known to man.  Another added bonus, we are not the most touristy island around, so we kind of keep to ourselves... no copious amounts of annoying tourist wandering around, trampling on our reality, or raising prices, or spoiling our well kept secret. 

There is enough rum, and beer, Caribbean Latin infused music to go around... Given that I am one of few Americans on the island... I am often asked when I will go back to the US... and I say if the wind blows hard enough to send me back (that would take a Tsunami btw)...plus I can't imagine living in the US again, not after this lifestyle... it's far too comfortable and manageable... I'M HERE TO STAY, YOU'RE STUCK WITH ME CURACAO (This one's for you Love).....

Cheers!

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Present, Past & Future

(I wrote this weeks ago and never published it...)
I got to thinking today about filling the gaps...What I mean is, I think when we grow up, no matter how miserable or happy that existence is, we are left with gaps.  That which creates our differences... it's a good thing, because through our diversity we hopefully learn to use our talents and gaps through life. Ok Example.. I grew up pretty independent... now if I was feeling sorry for myself, I would say neglected, or lonely... but I'm not there any more.  Now I like to take things more positively, and this way, I get to say independent.  This has afforded me the opportunity to learn a lot on my own.  I have become quite ingenious with problem solving because I didn't have anyone to teach me things, I HAD to learn on my own.  Now fast forward to being an adult, unlike a lot of friends I have that had amazing families... I don't have those kinds of ties, I'm not close to them.  So, I get to go off and live all over the planet, freely, because I don't have those ties.  

Don't get me wrong, it's taken a long time to get to this place, and of course I still have moments of longing for the kind of love and support I witness with my friends families.  But I realized I can not change the past or reality.  I need to appreciate the lessons and talents it has translated for me.  I wouldn't be the person I am today if not for my independent childhood.  Making up games for myself, learning to be happy playing alone... I have an easy time solving problems, and getting through sticky situations, because I had to figure out things on my own as a kid.  Which is great because not only can I help myself, I tend to help friends figure things out as well.  It's a nice skill.  I have enjoyed it, and continue to hone it.

Anyway... just a thought I had... as I always hear friends winging on about their pasts,  I say... "Live more proactively, more present..."  Move forward... wake up every day as if on purpose... ask for what you want... enjoy moments... keep your head up... keep looking forward....  What you desire will come to you... if you only simply believe it.
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