Choice Words...

Ever notice peoples choice of words... very revealing... everything from what they talk about to how they say it.  Example... "I don't know what happened... the thing just broke." Really??  It broke all by itself... or... YOU broke, albeit by accident, but You in fact did break it.  Hm.... lack of willingness to take responsibility (interesting).  Or how bout the all too inexplicable answer to "how are you"... No one person I know actually answers this question.  Fine, Good, Great, Another Day another dollar, soso... all usual answers.

Now, let's take this one step further... people all day long I hear saying things like, "I'm just not a good sleeper".. "my handwriting is terrible".. "I'm not the kind of person who... " (insert any crap on this one)... "I gain weigh just looking at sweets."

All examples of us CREATING our reality.  What if you decided to switch it up a bit... and stop the running dialogue/loop tape in your own head about not sleeping well.  Stop accepting that your reality is of some unknown making, in someone else's charge.  YOU are in charge.  So... all those things you are content with being not content with... decide what you want, and start to say THAT.  "I sleep so well at night I wake up not knowing where I am at times."  "I have so much money in the bank I don't know what to do with it all!"  Just try that one of for size.

You will realize not only how often you say these kinds of things out loud... but how often you say them to yourself... only fostering the design of things you don't want.  However the universe only hears what you SAY...  so change it!
PROACTIVE LIVING, I call it... wake up in the morning... and DECIDE right then.  "I am going to have a splendid day, full of opportunity, everything will just fall into place, I will have a happy good mood all day long... "

Remember what I always say... you can be specific BY ALL MEANS... ask for exactly what you want.  I did that and got the car of my dreams (in a used car lot, I think they didn't know what they had, I got lucky - whoops no such thing as luck... I CREATED IT!)  OR... you stay loose, and just ask for the essence of something (this way you give the Universe creative license to play)... I once asked for the time of my life... and I wound up backstage at a Paul Simon concert having dinner with the band.

Happy creating... MAY THE FORCE BE WITH YOU!!

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This is hilarious... Dane Cook "The LIE"

The TRUTH about LIES...

Ok... topics that I blog about are usually the result of me walking the dog in the late evening, by Caribbean moonlight so bright you see your shadow, with a small glass of really nice whiskey on ice, looking up at the stars.  Sometimes I write as a result of something I read or experienced... and then other times I write as an anthem or quest for knowledge.  This one is a bit of all of the above...  

I recently experienced something that made me take pause and think about the TRUTH vs. LIES... why people lie, and what they CHOOSE to tell the truth about...  And while some people are innately fabulous tennis players, I have a NOSE for the truth, like a bloodhound.  This is a perfect moment when I can say,"See, this is why I'm grateful I have experienced some hard times in my life... it makes me wise enough to SEE the TRUTH!"  This is a great skill I have honed... or maybe I've always had it.  I used to ask my father questions incessantly.  I was the QUEEN of "WHY" as a kid... and he was the king of bullshit, and somehow I always knew... This is probably what create that insatiable quest in me to always seek the truth. 

I think I have it figured out... people tell lies for one of many reason.  But when I see people avoiding the TRUTH, it is almost always for this reason - they want to be loved.  And they think if they tell you the truth, you won't love them, so they tell you something that they THINK will make you love them... IE, your 7 year old and a broken dish... or a wife scratching the new car... or husband loosing his wedding band... or of course much more grave things... like criminal lies... but in the end, we all just want to be loved... 

No excuse however...  We should all just live a life we are proud of, and be involved in things that make us happy... and we will have the courage to live in the world in a TRUE way.   The first stop of course is simply seeing the TRUTH... being honest with ourselves.

People lie about everything from a friend looking fat in "these pants"...  to lovers affairs... to job experience on a resume.  And my statement is... "Isn't the truth always easier?"... it's the same equivalent as RUSHING. If you rush, you spill your coffee on yourself, now you have to change your shirt.. now you are running late for work... and you trip over the leg of your chair and fall and break your toe (happens I know).  So in the end... telling the truth is easier, it makes less work for yourself,  it's usually one answer.  And besides which, I know that I don't have some sort of unique talent...  most everyone has an instinctual gut feeling when you are being told a lie.  Ever notice when you ask someone a question, and they answer, and you KNOW it's crap... you ask that same question over and over and over again... That is your instincts saying... "REJECT BUZZER!" to that answer... 

In the end, compassion will tell me that people lie because they want to tell you something that will make you love them... whether it's your 7 year old and the broken dish, or a criminal about that robbery he didn't commit.  Regardless, developing a good instinct for the truth will help you surround yourself with people who live a life of integrity... people that are "clean" and good...people that contribute to your life with their light!  TRUST trust trust your instincts, and you will avoid having poisonous people in your life.  

I always refer to my "stove is hot" analogy.  If someone says the stove is hot when you are young, you touch it because you don't know what hot is.  However, as an adult, you know not only what hot is... but that the stove is hot... DON'T test your instincts just to be SURE the stove is hot... you can see the heat rising off it, and feel the heat when you are just inches away, now just walk away... 

Occasionally, I find myself testing my instincts, and saying to myself "oh I don't want to be too judgmental..."  But that JUDGMENT is what keeps us alive.  It's an eat or be eaten world out there.  That same instinct that tells us to not to trust someone, is that same instinct an antelope has when they feel a LION watching them... and they RUN!  On that note...

Cheers... here's to the truth... and always telling it... UNLESS of course you are planning a surprise party... THEN by all means... LIE.  LOL

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When a man who is honestly mistaken hears the truth, he will either quit being mistaken, or cease to be honest.

-Unknown

Rather than love, than money, than fame, give me truth.

-Henry David Thoreau

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

-Mark Twain

Time is precious, but truth is more precious than time.

-Benjamin Disraeli

From error to error, one discovers the entire truth.

-Sigmund Freud

The man who fears no truth has nothing to fear from lies.

-Thomas Jefferson

Truth is the property of no individual but is the treasure of all men.

-Ralph Waldo Emerson 

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Hablo Espanol?? Un poco...

I have been learning to speak Spanish lately from the local Venezuelan Embassy... great experience.  The first question the teacher asked us was "why do we want to learn to speak Spanish?"  Everywhere I have lived, it would have behooved me to speak Spanish, given that I lived in places where there was a giant population of Latin Americans ... plus half the planet speaks Spanish.  So NOW I am finally learning...

I thought it would be easier, or rather I suppose I had hoped something had seeped in vicariously through osmosis since one of my best friends is Spanish, one is Mexican, and I lived in or around a predominantly Latin American community for 7 years or so. But I was mistaken... and to add insult to injury it's supposed to a BEGINNERS class that I'm in, HOWEVER most of the folks in the class you find out lived in Spain, or Columbia, or Mexico, but they want to learn the "proper way to speak" and they consider themselves beginners in that regard... yeah, my foot.  So the class moves MUY RAPIDO to say the least...

And while I would consider myself a star student, you know, front and center of class, glasses on, notebook, dictionary, and iPhone translator at the ready... always trying my best to answer questions. But there are days when the whole process really escapes me and I get entirely lost.  It doesn't happen often... but you put me in class of not-so-beginners, add the obnoxious German women answering their cell phones, add the funny little Dutch lady that talks TO HERSELF! loudly, then add the crazy Colombian guy that shouts out answers...  and it feels like the perfect storm.

So the other day, we were learning how to conjugate verbs and "food" vocab, and the teacher wanted to do an exercise where he went around the room, and we had to answer a random question about food... but he says "we go very fast"... meaning he wants you to do your best with what is at the tip of your tongue... testing us... books closed.  And because I'm at the front, he starts with me, big mistake, I need more than a second to gather my thoughts and few examples from the class always assist me with my answer.

Well this day was beyond my usual limits with the pace of the class and all the "chatty chuchas" in the class... and when the teacher asked me a question I actually now needed not only a second to come up with my answer, but first a minute to fully comprehend his question.  And when I asked him to repeat it, and the look on my face revealed I clearly still did not understand, one of my colleagues frustratedly shouted at me what the teacher was asking.  This incensed me, because I don't want to be given the answer, I WANT to learn.  Well needless to say the teacher could tell I was about either burst into tears or have my head pop off... I couldn't believe how frustrated I was, and how strongly I reacted.  NOW I finally get to my point... my reaction...

I have obviously been on this life long quest of learning how to live a healthy emotional & physical life.  And at this point in my journey, I now have some "tells" for when I need to pause, and take a step back.  This is one of them.  In moments when I come up against something, and have a very strong reaction, I know HERE is a place I have a lot of learning to do.  Example, if someone said to me, I had three arms - nope... no reaction, simply not true, I KNOW it.  However, when this arrogant woman at the gym made a flip comment about my trainer making me do all these (in her opinion) stupid exercises, and it not making a difference, I had a reallllly strong reaction.  I have been working really hard at my health and struggled with my weight my entire life, so this was difficult for me to dismiss.  What I really needed to look at was why I was reacting so strongly, why so insecure in that moment... Good self analysis to do... good "white lab coat" moment.  Same goes for this moment in the Spanish class.

I guess my point is to share something I have learned in one form or another, from everyone from my various yoga teachers, meditation instructors, analysts, and friends...and that is, when you have a really strong reaction to something or push against something with all your might... you may want to pause, and see what is at the root of that reaction, inevitably, it will have nothing to do with Spanish Class.... if ya know what mean. Nothing to do with my fitness...  but potentially a core insecurity, that needs to be worked out.

Ok... enough "deep thoughts" for the day.... let's go watch Nadal on center court for a bit... and then cheer on USA in the World Cup!!! WOOOHOOO!!!

Cheers all... here's to happy extinguishing of heated moments... ADIOS!

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IMAGINE (John Lennon style...)

I was thinking today about the concept of "want"... watching Isner and Mahut at Wimbledon, for the 3rd day (longest tennis match in history), both equally and energetically wanting to win this match... It's interesting to see the energy of one of the opponents inevitably leak out. One opponent has the freedom, unwavering and unabashed desire for the win, while the other inevitably feels not worthy, beaten, and can not clearly and really IMAGINE the win. Imagine having it, knowing it, and feeling it.

The key to this is like I said in an earlier post about wanting, there has to be a freedom in it. When you go into a Mexican restaurant, you EASILY order the fajitas and a Corona, and go back to your conversation munching tortillas chips and guacamole. Eventually, your order comes to your table, no problem. You never not once worried that potentially it wouldn't come, or rather maybe you would get spaghetti marinara instead. It's effortless...

Ah EFFORTLESS... now I start thinking of the things that are effortless... that we just plainly and EFFORTLESSLY expect, like the fajitas the beer. I'm sure there is a list of things you KNOW you are good at, things that are effortless in your life. When I was a child, I remember not trying just being really good at riding horses. I just LOVED it and my JOY assisted in making me great at it. I have a few girlfriends that are thin thin thin... and can eat anything. Key here is they believe that, and so it is. I believe I can just look at food and get heavy... AND SO IT IS. As Abraham Hicks says... You Ask and so you shall receive. The energy in the universe will concede to assist you in anything you imagine. Trouble here is that the effortless things we imagine are often times things we WORRY about. And because we imagined them so clearly/worried about them/pictured them/observed our current state... we received them... Debt, car accidents, failed love affairs... etc.

What if we took a more proactive approach to life, instead of thinking that life happens to us, let's have creative license and do a bit of design work. Deciding at the beginning of the day how things will go. Like the other day with the coffee/necklace story I told, somewhere in my brain I decided, it was going to be a rough day... and SO IT WAS. Ugh. I received comment on that post that painted the picture of my perfect day... and THAT is how we SHOULD wake up... like it's on purpose. Ready for the world to fall at our feet, with genuine confidence.

Now... It's one thing to imagine things and people and places you want in your life... and it's a whole other thing to embody that feeling of having it. You must feel it as well... just as much as you feel the things you worry about. They have equal strength. Something people don't consider when examining this concept... you might not believe in the kinetic energy of things... but think of the last thing you worried about, and how it manifested over and over in your life. Scary to think about - means you have to own the responsibility of creating those things in your life, just as much as you own the recognition for the good stuff... woops...

So now that we have worked out properly IMAGINING our greatest desires... one footnote...beware... a DESPERATE wanting will keep things from you. Because in the DESPERATION, there is a belief you don't REALLY deserve it... it won't ever reallllly come to you.

So... feel it, freely, effortlessly, and knowingly. And STOP WORRYING, 'cause you'll get that stuff too... plus STRESS is sooo bad for your body, spare yourself. Please...

Cheers! Here's to DESIGNING your every desire, every day!

Light it up!
IMAGINE!

IMAGINE by John Lennon

Wimbledon 2010: John Isner v Nicolas Mahut (The Finale To The Longest Ma...

Making of Day & Night